This piece came after a relationship that meant everything to me ended fiercely and left me feeling like I was living in the aftermath of a volcano. I had survived but it felt like a whole identity of who I believed I was had been wiped away, with parts of what had been there still active in my body, I didn’t know if I was trying to hold something of what they were, or wanting it all to disappear so that part of me could die or begin to form again.